Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Qualities of Motherhood

“You have the exact qualities God knew your kids would need in a mother….” Lysa TerKeurst

As I read this Facebook status the other day, I was thankful for such a timely reminder.
I had been struggling with this exact thing on that particular day - and on previous days. I was feeling pretty inadequate and a little discouraged as a mom. As we go about our days, there can be situations that happen that lead to us feeling that way.Recently, as we were rushing out of the house, my older boys could not find their shoes.As a mom, I have faced probably some of the hardest challenges I have ever dealt with in my life. There are days when I just have no clue what I am doing (or at least I feel that way!).The qualities of patience and grace were definitely not showing in this mom of three boys at this point.
This scene seems to happen quite regularly in my home, no one knowing where their shoes are - especially when we are in a hurry.I found the qualities of exasperation and frustration more prevalent at this point, but my boys did not need a crabby mom at that moment, as it was definitely not helping the already volatile situation. Still, I did not want to be helpful in finding shoes because, quite frankly, it was not my fault that they kicked off their shoes and didn’t leave them in the shoebox by the front door. After a quick lecture on the need to leave shoes where they can find them, I did let those frustrations go and found the qualities of patience and grace to help the boys find their shoes.

As a mom, I have faced probably some of the hardest challenges I have ever dealt with in my life. There are days when I just have no clue what I am doing (or at least I feel that way!). This was especially true when our oldest son was showing signs of developmental delays and was then diagnosed with autism at age 4.
I remember being told often, “You’re the best mom for this child. You’re so patient.” I was grateful for the encouragement and that someone else was able to see that quality that I wasn’t always able to see myself.
I felt very inadequate for the job description and unprepared for what lay ahead of us. I have found, though,
especially in those early days of diagnosis, that somehow God seemed to give me the qualities I needed at that time, whether it was patience, strength, wisdom or grace as we faced difficult and unknown days.

We have been blessed with three very energetic, fun boys.As I grow older and face different challenges in motherhood, I am seeing that I am attaining new qualities, too. Strength to wipe up another messy footprint on the floor. Grace to deal with my son’s repetitive autistic behavior. Patience with my persistent and curious 7-year-old who likes to ask lots of questions, and endurance as I take care of the constant needs of a 5-month-old! Sometimes, we have no idea the kind of qualities we actually have until we are put in certain situations, and for that I am very thankful.

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